Anytime you write stories from your life, some chapters just fly off the page. Other chapters not so much. How do we get through this? One of the things we have found at Page & Podium is to have a list of question prompts. I’m going to share those prompts and it’ll make outlining and writing your stories much simpler.
How do you get unstuck when chapter material won’t flow? I’ve got six questions that you can use to guide your work. But before we get into the questions, make sure, with this technique, that you have just one scene in mind. One thing I see authors struggle is with picking a period in their life as a whole chapter as opposed to just one story.
Imagine the spring of 1998, a three-month period. How many things happened to you during spring of 1998? I was a junior in high school, a very dramatic time, but it’s a scene not in focus. You need to zero in on one story that represents the whole time period. You might have three or more stories but narrow it down to just one scene. It will make getting started much easier.
Think about who you were in your scene.
The first question is going to be about timeline. While thinking about this scene, ask yourself what you were doing before and after that thing happened. Ask yourself specific questions about the time context. Think about what propelled you forward, what choices were made. Thinking about your timeline is going to help give context to your reader, but it’ll also help you remember who you were at that time.
One of the things I see when I work with leaders on books is that some look at all past stories from the lens of who they are now. It can lead to them saying, “I looked so stupid when I was doing that.” I’ve had authors tell me when they started writing a scene, they said, “Why was I making those dumb choices?” Be kind to yourself first.
When you’re writing these past experiences, remember you were coming from a different place without the knowledge, experience or training you have now. Instead, we want to think about the context of the timing. Why did you make the choices you did in that moment? What was the big event that happened before? What was the time of day and where were you on your journey in life? That particular decision shaped the next ones you made.
Consider who you surrounded yourself with.
The second set of questions is about the context of the people, both at the micro and macro level. In your scene, who else was there? Adding context gives your story more color. One of our coach clients, Maggie, uses this question when writing about her teenage years. Back then, in 2004, 2005, it was all JNKOs and big chains, shopping at Hot Topic and wearing baby tees. It’s funny to look back at. What she writes is heavy, traumatic material but it’s an inspiring story.
When you’re writing a heavy story, one full of hard lessons, you need breaks for humor. Think about the people you were with, what they wore, their personalities and characteristics and so on. It’ll give you a richer picture when you think back to why you made the decisions you did and why it’s important now.
When you think about the people in your life at the time, at the macro level, weren’t not talking about just one scene. We want to make sure that we are putting that scene in the context of who you were. Who we are is always based on who’s around you at the time. It’s always because of the people we talk to, live with, work with, and hang out with on a day-to-day basis. Those are the people that are really going to tell us where our mindset was at the time.
Maybe you were with somebody that became a serious, long-term relationship. Maybe they’re your life partner now. That time frame, that young love, can be an exciting time. Maybe you spent time with friends that led you down the wrong path or were a toxic influence on your life. Remember that guy who had said, “Oh, why did I do that stupid decision?” Sometimes the answer is the people that you were with. Think about the people you were with on a macro level, and a micro level, and it will help you get inside the mindset of who you were in your scene.
Ask yourself where home was in your scene.
So now, you’ve got timeline and people. The third question you should ask yourself is about place. Again, micro and macro. The place where your scene happened is going to be your macro place. Maybe it’s your hometown or a city you moved to after college. For my client, Maggie, this was a big deal for her because she lived in many places during her scene. Constantly moving creates a lot of tumultuous energy for a teenager, especially if they are also changing schools.
If you can imagine your place, how you settled there, your comfort level and so on, it will help define that period in your life. We want to know, as readers, the sensory details of your scene. What did it smell like? What was the vibe? Was it loud, quiet, dark or light? This is one of my favorite parts about any story-based book.
The atmosphere of the scene generally doesn’t matter. If something terrible happened in your scene when it should have been bright, cheery and neat, it makes the story powerful. Maybe it was a place that seemed unsafe but instead something amazing happened. Maybe a bright, cheery place will match an amazing event. Maybe a dark, scary scene will match a terrible event. Either way, those sensory details paint a picture in your reader’s mind.
As a reader, we always want to be transported to another place when we read, but doing this will help spell out your message as well. If you have a contrast between the place in your scene and what it smelled or felt like, power is shared. It’s tension. It helps your reader understand where your mind was when we cover places, as well as people, in the timeline.
Think about when emotions took over.
The fourth set of questions we want to think about is your emotions. When you think back to pivotal moments in your life, the happiest or most terrible memory you have, you know what those emotions are. Because you lived it, it left an impression. Usually, we’re pretty good at coming up with what we felt like in those moments. When we write memoirs, or leadership books, not every scene is the most pivotal in our life. Sometimes, it’s just about the day-to-day, and you’re going to need to know those details just as well. Start answering these questions about your time, people, place, and it’ll stir up those emotions.
These questions can be difficult, so watch your mental health if you’re writing about trauma. If your chest feels heavy, your jaw is tight, just lay down. I always suggest getting a therapist if you’re writing about trauma. Then, you can debrief with them to make sure you’re okay.
That aside, as you’re thinking about your emotions in your scene, really brainstorm. Reflect on what you were feeling in the exact moment, right before and right after. Did your emotions change? Did you come to terms? As readers, we want to know what your emotions were in detail. Don’t just write “I’m happy. I’m sad.” Have your emotions in mind, because if you don’t know what they are, you can’t write about it.
Remember how you reacted to your scene.
The fifth set of questions are fed by your emotions in your scene. This set of questions is all about your reaction. When you’re thinking about your scene, think about how you processed it psychologically.
For example, if you see a tiger in the jungle, you’re probably going to be scared. You’ll see the tiger, then you’ll have the reaction and then the response. When your turning point of the scene happened, think about it in this order: What did you see? What did you feel? How did you react? It will be the easiest way to write your scene with impact. But first, you have to remember what you did, step-by-step.
Your expectations matter.
Now, the final point. Write your expectations. You lived this scene, but we did not. What were you expecting to happen during your scene? Did it happen exactly as you thought? Generally, that’s pretty rare. When circumstances didn’t go as planned, it’s an exciting point for the reader. However hard that scene was for you, you reader wants to feel it with you.
Think about your expectations at the micro level and also what happened before and after. What challenged the expectations you had in that moment? Particularly for a memoir, what did you expect your life was going to be? How did your scene change you? Did that scene change your message or did it stay the same? What should be a takeaway? What took you by surprise? Us, as readers, want to know.
As you’re planning your next chapter, keep these questions close and follow them in order. If you find you can’t start writing based on these questions, you might consider journaling to get all that stuff out. This is common when we work with people who have a lot of trauma. The act of moving a pencil over paper is a powerful signal to tell your brain that the trauma is in your past and it’s safe now. You are reflecting, not living in that moment.
A lot of processing happens when you write a book. Be kind to yourself. Use every tool at your disposal, such as a therapist, journaling, and taking breaks. You’ll get your scene onto the page and help so many people. I would love to support you one-on-one if you’re thinking it might be time for you to bring in some professional support.
At Page and Podium Press, we’re on a mission to make sure everyone has access to the support they need to tell their story well. That’s why we’re offering the Change Maker package, a brand new service that will help you with ghostwriting and editing. While this package is only available to our newsletter subscribers right now, take the book strategy quiz to keep you up to date on when we release it to the public and gain helpful information along the way. You deserve to have your story out there.
Happy writing!
