When you have a book project in your heart and back of mind, it can hurt to realize that yet again another week or month has gone by and you haven’t made any real progress. It’s hard to find time in our busy calendars, and when it comes, it’s hard to make it really work for us and get the most of out that hour or even that twenty minutes. You’re not alone. Finding time to write is one of the biggest hurdles writers face. Even professional writers have trouble fitting their passion or personal projects into the weekly calendar. The problem is more complicated than simply blocking off calendar time. To find—and actually use—writing time, we need to set ourselves up for success before that blocked off hour actually arrives. Watch below or read on for six ways you can not only protect your writing time, but make it count, make it sustainable, and make it fulfilling.
Before we get into today’s post, we wanted to ask—do you have a plan for actually finishing your memoir? If not, we know you aren’t making the progress you hoped for. That’s why we developed The Memoir Method Checklist. This free guide (and video training!) will take you through every single step you need from idea to published marketable book. Grab it now at https://pageandpodium.com/checklist
The Roots of the Problem
Like most problems, to solve this one we have to really understand why it’s happening. One of the reasons having this obstacle hurts us as writers is that we often—completely unfairly to ourselves—take this as evidence that we just aren’t good enough, or that we’re not “really” writers. You schedule time to write and something comes up, or you plan to write a thousand words but when you sit down to do it—it doesn’t come easily. You fall short of your goals week after week. When you internalize this as evidence of some essential failing, it just makes it harder to change the pattern.
You don’t have a plan
One of the main causes of this problem is not having a plan, which is why we have created our The Memoir Method Checklist. When we have a really clear picture of where we’re going, and the different kinds of steps that go into it, we can make better and more realistic expectations of ourselves. Because as we’ve said on this blog before, making progress in your book might not always mean adding to your word count. If you have set time aside to work on your book, but don’t have a clear plan for what piece you’ll be working on that time, then that time won’t be as productive as it could be. Think about it this way—if you decide you want to exercise more and block off half and hour for it three times a week, it’s not going to work unless you also decide what kind of exercise you’ll be doing. You’ll spend that time trying to figure out what kind of exercise to do. We need to make space for the planning as well as the execution.
Creativity needs room to breathe
When we put pressure on ourselves, the creative side is the first to suffer. Writing is a form of self-expression, an exercise of freedom. There are practical steps we can take to work through a project in a sensible way, but at the heart of it we also need to give ourselves mental space to stretch and breathe. It allows us to really show up to the page and give our creative energy to the project. Because your book deserves it, and so do you.
So often we fall into routines where all the best of our creative energies are spent on others. It’s lovely to give of ourselves, but we also can show up better for our people when we have also given ourselves expressive and creative space.
There is a balance to this act. We want to release some of the pressure, especially that we give ourselves through negative self-talk because it’s so counterproductive. But we also want to have a clear plan with sensible steps—supporting ourselves practically as well as emotionally. It’s good to have a quantitative goal for yourself, as meeting these markers can help you gain momentum, but these markers also need to be based on a big-picture plan!
Have a clear goal for every writing session
We are big fans of having a clear outline at Page & Podium. Outlines are a great way to balance these creative and practical needs because it ensures you have a clear structure to your work as a whole. It also gives you a breakdown so you can make better use of that writing time. You will feel a very clear difference between blocking off time to “write a thousand words” and time to “write the scene with the dog and the cotton candy and a reflection about what it meant” (made up example). When you have that specificity as part of your plan, you’ll be thinking about that scene well before it’s time to sit down and write. With that mental rehearsal you made while washing your dishes or taking your morning shower, you’ll be raring to go by the time your sit-down time has come.
But this is also important for sessions that might not be drafting sessions, especially in the early development stages. As you are developing your ideas and your outline, you will probably face big-picture decisions that you need to wrestle with. You may be wrestling with what your real key message is or how much research you might need to do. These decisions deserve and take time. If you block of time to “write a thousand words” when what you really need to do next is to decide where your memoir should end, of course you’re going to be frustrated and count that time as “wasted.”
Your goals should not be the same every writing session. You’re going to be in different stages of the process, and you’ll have different amounts of time at different times of day. Expecting the same metric to mean success every time is unfair to you. Take this all into consideration when you make your goals and be sure to count your wins.
You don’t have to write. You get to.
You are setting out to write this book for yourself. When you embrace that, you can look forward to those writing times as time you’re investing in yourself, your creative expression, and the goals that only matter to you. Often writers spend time reaching for ways to make out brains classify writing as a “have to.” After all, that’s why we block off calendar time, right? So we can reinforce the idea that we have to do this, assuming that will increase the chances that we actually will.
But has that pressure been working for you? It’s demoralizing to think of exercising our creativity in the same terms as picking up prescriptions.
When we switch to “get to,” we reinforce that yes, this project is for us, but we deserve to make sure we have time we get to do it. You can even up the ante. “I get to, even if…”
I get to write, even if the laundry hasn’t been done yet. I get to write, even is that means skipping that meeting. You get to because you deserve it.
Steal time from different things each week
When you’re writing, it means you’re not doing something else. If you wait until there’s nothing else to do, you’ll never start.
If you want to get it done, that means you need to learn to be okay with what you’re not doing. That can be so hard, especially when society trains us (especially women) to spend our times productive or in service to others. It can also be hard practically—if you are always writing instead of the laundry, you’re gonna run out of clothes.
Also, the other parts of our lives really do matter to us. We want to do other things for ourselves in addition to writing. Enjoying brunch with friends, family time with kids, exercise—these matter too. So as you are planning your writing time for the week and what the goals of those sessions will be, also think about what you’re going to be stealing from. This can change from week to week, and this way it’s much easier to avoid feelings of both guilt and deprivation.
Be open to the call
We’re big advocates of blocking off time to write, but sometimes something really delicious happens. Sometimes you feel the urge to write right now. It might not be part of your plan for the day, at all. But suddenly it’s there like an itch–you want to throw out the plan and write because suddenly you have an idea about how to open chapter six or that piece of dialogue that will really make the next chapter sing.
If you can, do it. Its delicious and it will just make you want to write more and more, in every little open space.
Sometimes—you won’t be able to translate the call to sitting down in that moment. Somethings can’t be set aside in the spur of the moment, but you can still hear that call. Lean into it and enjoy it. Let it drive you to find the next moment you can sit down.
Don’t let perfect be the enemy of good
Things will come up. Headaches will arise. Interruptions are as certain as the rain.
If you aren’t able to dedicate the time and focus you wanted, embrace whatever imperfect time and energy you are able to give. Carry it forward to the next time.
Find support for your writing
It’s a long journey. Having an external source of motivation, support, and guidance can be invaluable. If you’re spending your writing time beating yourself up about how you’re spending your writing time, you might need a helping hand to get you out of that spiral.
That is one of the reasons we have developed the Memoir Method group. We know that an MFA or major program is often not what memoir writers really need. They need a clear plan, guidance as they go through the steps, and accountability and support as they work through the process. We’re excited to share that we are now accepting rolling applications to The Memoir Method. If you want to change your patterns and get your memoir written and want to know how the Memoir Method can help you accomplish that, check us out at pageandpodium.com/apply
PS. Searching the internet for writing, publishing, and book marketing advice can be exhausting to say the least! If you’re ready for hands on, one-on-one support for your memoir, check out The Memoir Method. We’d love to welcome you into this nine-month group program specially designed for women writing their first memoirs. And don’t forget, if you’d like to chat with Amanda about the program (or any other services we offer), you can book a free consult any time!
